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When I was a child

When we are children, we begin to live our sexuality without even knowing it. Experimenting with our nakedness with the curiosity to know how our body works. We do it without any type of sexual intention or taboo, just with the only curious intention of making new discoveries about emotions, sensations, instinct, perception ... Even if we are not aware of why of things, somehow we can feel it and let go by that intuition.

When I was a girl, I remember that I loved playing moms and dads. And it's funny, but I did not play with boys, I did with girls (so it was a game of moms and moms, since we never assigned the male role). Our games consisted of repeating what we saw in adults, ... we wanted to be like them.

Mainly one of my girlfriends and I played this game together. We got naked under the sheets and in the dark, we kissed each other, we caressed each other,… With her, It was the first time I had physical contact with another naked person. It was a different experience, something new. I remember that we had feelings that we did not understand, something that ignited my curiosity a lot. We played as if it were another game, something normal, but at the same time, we knew that we could not play in front of adults. One time, they caught us, they scolded us both, but in my case, they also punished me, since my friend blamed me for having encouraged her to practice that game. They told us that we were being bad, immoral and indecent girls, being touching and playing naked.

It's something very curious, because when it was time to have a shower, we sometimes showered together, exposing our bodies, we soaped each other, but of course, we were supervised by an adult person and the situation was not the same. Nudity and touching was only allowed at specific times and under strict supervision.

Returning to the above, faced with this situation, I felt very guilty, ashamed and sad because I did not understand what was wrong with what we were doing. I felt judged. Now I know that adult person imposed on me his fears and prejudices without giving me the opportunity to live my own experiences. I just wanted to calm my curiosity, play like any child, but of course, In our society there are many prejudices regarding sexuality, nowadays as well as in the past. It's only deemed "good" when in privacy and very few other exceptions. That is why we avoid talking to a child about sexuality, because "supposedly" is a subject for which they are not prepared and which affects them "negatively".

Let's not forget that sexuality is very broad. There are many positive ways to convey to children the information they need about their bodies and their sexuality in general so that they have a good relationship with themselves. And it is from very young can learn to feel the wisdom that is in us and not fear the reactions and changes that we may feel, so we will be able to understand our sexuality positively.

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